Bergen to Berne

Dateline Switzerland

Wednesday 20th August, 2025

Series 2 Instalment 11

Three days on a boat? We are supposed to be riding bikes, not lounging around on a cruise ship! Actually, for Sally and I at least it was just what we needed. Norway is an intense experience, a constant bombardment of visual splendour, perfect roads, fabulous food and beautiful people. A little break was just what the doctor ordered. The Hurtigruten Express has been plying these waters for over 100 years acting as a supply life line for the many coastal communities of Norway. It still performs this function today but has morphed into a tourist vessel come mail truck come vehicle ferry. To call it an express is a complete misnomer as we slide in and out of fjord after fjord picking up passengers and dropping off supplies. At some of the stops we get a brief opportunity to go ashore and explore the towns. At others we are in and out in a few minutes.

On day three we disembark in Bergen, a gorgeous sea side town/city where  https://compassexpeditions.com/ have booked us into yet another top class hotel in the city centre. From here we head south into more startlingly picturesque country side over extreme mountain passes on narrow twisting roads that have hearts pumping and nerves jangling. In pissing rain and fog we tackle the road to Lysebotn, by far the most outrageous piece of road I have ever seen. Take a look below.

There is also a day almost entirely dedicated to waterfalls. After Iceland Sally and I thought we had seen enough waterfalls, that is until we saw this one particular valley. At one point I stood in an open area and turned full circle counting waterfalls. I got 12 separate streams crashing down the surrounding mountains but these were small fry compared to what was just around the corner. Dozens of raging torrents thundering from the mountain tops. At another, point two enormous rivers of thundering, boiling rage crash into each other right beside the road.

Oh and did I mention the glacier. Yes, yes there was one of those too. And the road with the cork screw tunnel…OK I’m gibbering now but I swear it’s all true and then some.

All too soon we are in Denmark, flat as a pancake Denmark but before we can relax too much we have our senses knocked slightly out of alignment with a visit to the world’s second biggest Elvis museum complete with a full scale reproduction of the Graceland’s Mansion. Huh? WTF? There is also a smaller, but to me at least, infinitely more interesting Johnny Cash museum in the grounds.

Driving on European roads can be quite the experience for us Aussies, apart from the fact that they all drive on the wrong side of the road. In some countries like Iceland and Norway, the general speed limit is 80 kph but that really ain’t so bad as you are usually too preoccupied with the scenery. In other places like France and Denmark it is 120, but Germany, oh my goodness Germany!! On the Autobahns there is no limit. To be sitting in the slow lane at a peaceful 110 kph only to have a procession of German saloons and wagons thunder past at perhaps 2 and a half times your speed (yes I really mean 275) is something you must experience first hand to fully comprehend. And despite all the draconian legislation and punitive enforcement we have been inculcated into believing is for our own safety in Australia, these drivers don’t all die in exploding balls of flame or kill thousands of innocent children, they merely go about there daily routine at a speed they have become comfortable with.

After 21 days of “What the hell just happened?” we are back where we started, in Hamburg and the gang steadily disband back to their respective homes or on to their next adventure. For our part, we have to get the bike serviced and happily that all goes smoothly. We take a leisurely day in the northern German town of Lubeck then head south on the recommendation of several well travelled tourists to the city of Bruges in Belgium, perhaps the best preserved Medieval city in the world.

We get lucky and find a room in a very comfortable hotel in the shadow of the 83 metre high clock tower in the city centre so we spend a full day exploring on foot, eating pizza and ice cream, drinking beer (Baileys and chocolate milk for Sally) and generally just soaking it all in.

 

We find the Salvador Dali gallery just around the corner from the hotel and we are enthralled by the man’s brilliant work though it is clearly the work of a troubled mind (or some excellent drugs)

By night we find an open air tango floor and try as she might Sally could not convince me to join in. I have all the grace and rhythm of a house brick.

We pay a flying visit to Paris and stay only long enough to do a couple of laps around the Arc de Triomphe

then have lunch in a sidewalk cafe about 100 m from the Eiffel Tower.

From here we seek out, and find le Chateau de la Motte-Husson, the subject of one of Sally’s favourite TV shows, Escape to the Chateau. We park in a roadside lay by out front from where we can see Dick Strawbridge and the 2 kids Arthur and Dorothy playing in the front yard about 100 m away. Sally, never backward in coming forward, ignores the notice at the front gate and marches straight down the driveway and introduces herself. To his everlasting credit, Mr Strawbridge does not order her off the property but instead, after politely pointing out that they are not open to the public, engages her in a lengthy discussion on topics ranging from the Chateau to Tasmania, our mutual friend Charley Boorman and the ignorant tourists who turn up unannounced and demand to be let in. At least Sally takes her cue and leaves while thanking him profusely for his time.

We are on a fairly tight timeline so unfortunately we do not have the time to properly immerse ourselves in the obvious culture and history that surround us but merely snatch fleeting glimpses on our way past. We have been warned that the French can be ignorant, rude and abrupt, especially if you don’t speak the language, which we don’t. Our own experience has however been the complete opposite. Even those who can’t speak any English (most speak a little) are happy to try to communicate with a combination of sign language, pointing and smiling.

The tight schedule sees us stop briefly at the Le Mans motor racing circuit which was closed for a private testing session so no lap record attempts for us today.

Then we stop in the very quaint ancient city of Laval in the Loire Valley for the evening before heading east again toward Switzerland, land of clocks, cheese and Alps.

Along the way we start to notice the very distinctive breed of cattle, the Montbeliarde. We have a special soft spot for these gentle creatures as we bred some of them on our farm in Tamworth NSW a lifetime ago.

 

We were also told that Switzerland has extreme traffic laws with vicious enforcement and extreme penalties for transgression. Again we see no evidence of this but hey, we have only been here a day, give us a chance. Let’s see what mischief we can get up to tomorrow.